Monday, May 23, 2011

What's in Your Closet?

Do writers get depressed more than--other people? I was going to say--normal people, but who's normal? A writer on one of the lists I'm on recently sounded depressed and we all jumped in with our remedies. Is there a writer who doesn't have his own closet of depression aids?

Maybe it goes with the territory. After all, the reason I write is to stave off depression. It's one of the tools in my closet. It just dawned on me, while reading the aforementioned online list, that maybe the reason I'm writing humor is because of the value of funny books for me.

Here are the weapons in my anti-depression closet.

(1) Writing. It doesn't matter what kind. Any kind. A therapist once asked me what I'd be doing if I could do anything I want. Without hesitation, I told her I'd write. She ordered me to carve out at least an hour every week to write, with the door shut, not answer the phone or doorbell, tell hubby to tend the kids--and write. It was pure heaven and saved my sanity!

(2) Reading funny books. I keep funny books together on a shelf. I used to use James Thurber exclusively. Then I added the Jeeves books by P. G. Wodehouse. Then I discovered David Sedaris. Any of these will have me laughing out loud eventually, no matter how far down I've gone. When I was a young child, a doctor had a column in the local paper (although maybe it was a national column). People wrote in with health problems. Most of the time, the recommended cure was "belly breathing", whatever that is. (NOTE: I LIKE the punctuation outside the comma--so shoot me.) Well, my recommended cure is belly laughing.

(3) 250 mgs. of magnesium daily. Don't ask me why, but this seems to help. A lot.

(4) My Attagirl list. I keep this on the computer. I label emails with this and keep them in a folder. Whenever someone says something nice about my writing I put it there. So when I'm having those days when I KNOW my writing sucks and no one would ever want to read such sludge, I can pull those emails up and re-read them. Know what? I never do. But I know they're there, and that's a help.

(4) Therapy, of course. When I go over the edge, that's what I know I have to do. I'll share a funny "depressed writer" story about therapy. My therapist asked me to write a piece personifying my depression and bring it to our next session. My depression turned out to be an adult male (who knows?) who was constantly beside me telling me those things depression tells a person. About how I'm useless, don't bother, no one cares about me, why should they, I'm not worth it, etc. I was driving and he was in the passenger seat berating me. I knew I had to murder him (I'm a mystery writer, after all). So I drove onto a high overpass and went over the rail. As the car plunged down, carrying both of us with it, I knew he'd be dead at the bottom. It was a good feeling. My therapist was a little alarmed, but I assured her I wasn't suicidal at the moment. I'd just killed off my depression. I, as the writer, survived.

Are you a writer? Do you get depressed? What's in your closet?

The image is owned by Simon Palmer and is licensed for reuse under the Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 2.0 license.

13 comments:

  1. Great tips. I love the attagirl file. I think I need one of those. The writing life is such a roller coaster of emotions. Thanks for sharing Kaye.
    kristi from guppies!

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  2. Hope this helps someone! Thanks for stopping by, Kristi.

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  3. Kaye, I would add exercise. Walking, outdoors if possible.

    This is a good post. Thanks for addressing an issue lots of people in our supposedly enlightened society still find uncomfortable to discuss.

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  4. Yes, exercise definitely! I never would have dared to talk openly about this, especially online, when I got a paycheck from a company. But now that I work for myself, I have nothing to fear from the corporate world. If you have a boss, I still think it's a bad idea to let anyone know that anything is "wrong" with you. Not the way it should be, I know, but....

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  5. Pet cat. Eat chocolate. Don't get the two confused!

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  6. Good advice! I hate that furry-mouth feeling.

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  7. Hello...I just stumbled across your blog and I have to say I love it! I am a writer too..one that finds herself depressed at times. I too had a therapist ask me that very same question of what I would do if I could do anything I want..and I told her 'WRITE'. I love it...but with that said..I am my own worst enemy and so self critical. I'm on a road of my own to discover myself..with weightloss and the one thing I love to do most...write. I look forward to more of your posts.

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  8. That self-criticism is you depression talking, Debi! But you knew that, right? If you can only shut it up. :) Good luck with the writing--and the weight loss, a whole 'nother subject.

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  9. Hi Kaye, Thank you for posting this. Writers and artists do experience depression often and it can be debilitating. If I didn't have my writing, my collection of funny and cozy books, belly laughs, and family and friends, then well...who knows. I am thankful for all of the above and I would like to add that once in awhile a good cry helps. Too often we are taught to hold back the tears, when in fact, tears are nature's way of cleansing and healing. Thank you for posting this, Kaye.

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  10. You're right, Kellie. A good, sad movie is just the thing sometimes. I do feel good after sobbing through one of those. Or, just having a good cry, but sometimes it's hard to do without a movie.

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  11. A therapist asked what I really wanted to do and I said, "Sing at the Met. All the Judith Blegen roles." He said, "What's next?" So now I write. For my money, belly laughs are the best cure for just about anything.

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  12. Come on over some day and I'll play violin while you sing. We'll say we "met" for this and you'll have achieved your dream. You think?

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  13. I think writing is good because it provides a good way to break away from a problem and we are entering a different world!
    we become a director in there .....

    I also love to write, but yet I sent to the media, only for consumption only facebook ... :)

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